... i don't think we (as a society) need that many couples cou | QuebécianGhost

...
i don't think we (as a society) need that many couples
couples kissing on the street
couples smiling
couples holding hands
couples being happy
unaware that statistically speaking
most of them won't be together a year from now
living in an ignorant bliss for now
while giving me PTSD over and over again
by simply existing

"stop posting pictures together just to delete them months later"
"stop going on dates and disappointing each other
the moment you start living together"
"stop acting cute in public"
“stop making me see”
i want to scream in their faces
and smash the flowers that
boys have been buying for the 8th of march
instead of going to protests for women's right to abortion


...and i see you
and the world skips a beat
or two
while i try to escape your gaze
by looking right at you
and walking sideways
but you smile and say ”hi”
and i smile too
but you're just being polite

does everyone have a new inner voice for every person they've dated?
or do i just have BPD
or attachment issues
or any other modern word to describe a person
simply existing
or maybe that's what ending a relationship

i can get rid of you
but how can i get rid of all the pieces of you still reflected in me

do you get enough rest?  
do you eat well?
do you feel loved?  
how did you spend your last birthday?  
are you going on dates?  
do you have good friends?

too many things unsaid
never enough time to ask them all
and beauty is not enough but i want it to be
no matter how huge the love is and how intoxicating
it won't change the things we still lack
so i turn around too
to keep the tears on a leash of my heart
until i walk around the corner and can
let everything out
Cause our time is over
...