Bookworm

2021-12-12 20:43:17 2/2
ushbu post bookwormdagi eng so'ngisi bo'lishini istadim

Qanday qilib xronik depressiya va xavotir buzilishlarni yengganim, travmalar, og'ir yo'qotishlar, chet elga moslashishdagi qiyinchiliklar, psixoterapiya va bookworm faoliyati to'xtalishi haqida

Psixoterapiya
Sarvinoz bilan terapiya deyarli bir yil davom etdi. Terapiya davomida muammoning tub ildizlarini topish, depressiya va xavotir xurujlarini boshqarish, hayot tarzimni yaxshilash kabi ko'plab masalalar ustida ishladik. Sarvinoz haqiqiy professional. Buni ilk konsultatsiyadayoq payqaganman va noto'g'ri qaror qilmaganimga ishonch xosil qilganman. Hozirgi holatimga qaytishimda uning hizmatlari cheksiz. Bunday chuqurlikdan qaytib chiqolishimga ishontirgan va bunni uddalatgan ham u. Biz buni u bilan birga uddaladik. Buning uchun Sarvinozdan bir umr minnatdorman.

The new beginning
Hozir hammasi yaxshi. Rosti, hech qachon bundan yaxshi bo'lmagan. Qolib ketgan reja va maqsadlarimni birin-ketin yetkazib uddasidan chiqyapman. To'g'ri, ba'zan kayfiyatim bo'lmasligi mumkin. Hatto kichik depressiv epizodlar ham, xavotir xurujlari ham qaytalanib turadi va bu normal. Ammo, endi bunday holatlar meni ortiq o'z domiga tortib ketolmaydi. Depresiya va xavotirlar bilan qanday ishlash bo'yicha o'rttirgan ko'nikmalarim bunda katta yordam beryapti va bundan keyin ham bir umr asqotishiga ishonaman. Hozircha, hammasini bir o'zim eplayapman.

Bookworm tugatilishi to'g'risida
Bookworm hech qachon mening shaxsiy g'oyam bo'lmagan. Uni yaqin insonim bilan birga yaratganmiz. Boshida u bilan birga yozdik. Birga harakat qildik. Afsuski, kun kelib u bilan xayrlashishimga to'g'ri keldi. Ammo, shundan keyin bookworm oldingidek bo'lolmadi. Qancha harakat qilmay, qaytib oldingidek yozolmadim. Shu sababdan, bookwormni birato'la to'xtatishga qaror qildim.
Shu o'tgan 3 yil ichida bookwormni yolg'izlatmagan siz azizlarga cheksiz tashakkur aytaman. Aloqa botiga keladigan iliq xabarlaringiz men uchun bir olam ahamiyatga ega. Ularni doim qadrlaganman. Vaqtiki kelib yodingizga tushib qolsam, meni yana shu botdan toparsiz. Uni o'chirmoqchi emasman. Yana alohida aytishim kerak, shu o'tgan davr ichida aynan bookworm sabab juda ko'p chin do'stlar ortdirdim. @mahinsworld - Mahinim va @kitobooknigam - eng ardoqlaganlarim. Barchangizdan cheksiz minnatdorman.
Yaxshiyam borsiz, yaxshilar!

Iliq samimiyat va ulkan hurmat ila,

sizning kitobqurti yozdim.

E'tiboringiz uchun rahmat!
2021.12.12
J.Koreya

happy reading!
@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-12 20:43:16 1/2
ushbu post bookwormdagi eng so'ngisi bo'lishini istadim

Qanday qilib xronik depressiya va xavotir buzilishlarni yengganim, travmalar, og'ir yo'qotishlar, chet elga moslashishdagi qiyinchiliklar, psixoterapiya va bookworm faoliyati to'xtalishi haqida

Qora kunlar
Oxirgi bir necha yil hayotimda turli zarbalar, sinov va yo'qotishlarga boy bo'ldi. Bolalikda ortdirilgan travmalar, yangi jamiyatga moslashishda yuzbergan qiyinchiliklar va shaxsiy hayotimdagi turli muammolar ruxiyatimga qattiq ta'sir qila boshladi. Tog'ri, qaysidir ma'noda, bulardan nimalarnidir o'rgandim, xarakterim shakillandi. Ammo, bu sinovlar o'z navbatida salbiy oqibatlarga ham olib kelmay qolmadi. Bir necha yil davom etgan xronik depressiya va buning natijasida shakillangan xavotir buzilishlari hayotimni haqiqiy ma'noda ortga tortayotgan edi. Atrofimdagi tengqurlarim mendan o'zib ketishgan, katta-katta marralarni zabt etishayotgan bir paytda, men kunni tunga bazo'r ulab olishgada kuchim yetmas edi. U paytlari suiqasd va o'lim haqidagi o'y-xayollarsiz o'tgan kunlarim deyarli bo'lmagan. Qisqasi, qorong'i zimiston ichida yashayotgandek bo'lardim. Hech narsaning qizig'i qolmagan, hayotdan ma'ni ham,umid ham ko'rmas edim. O'qishimga ham e'tibor bermay qo'yganim sabab baholarim ham sekin-asta pasaya boshlagan edi. Ishga ham o'lganni kunidan borib kelar, yeyishga yetarli pulim bo'lsa, bormay ham qo'yaverar edim. Boshqa yoshlardek nimadirlarga erishish, qattiqroq harakat qilish, muvaffaqqiyat kabi narsalar meni umuman qiziqtirmas, chunonchi balandparvoz eshitilar edi. Kunlarim deyarli uyqi bilan o'tar, o'rnimdan turish ham bir katta yumushdek tuyilardi. Bu holat yangi jamiaytga moslashishimga ham halaqit qildi. Bu esa, o'z navbatida bu yerdagi hayotimni qiyinlashtirib borardi. Shu o'rinda, yaqinim - Shaxboz hayotimdagi yagona tirgak bo'lganini alohida ta'kidlab o'tmoqchiman. Ham moddiy, ham ma'naviy yordamini hech qachon ayamadi. U bo'lmaganda, men ham hozirgacha yo'q bo'lib ketgan bo'larmidim. Ba'zan, xudo biz bir o'zimiz kurashishga kuchimiz yetmasligini yaxshi bilib, yordamchi farishta yuborar ekan. Shaxboz shunday farishtalardan edi.

Holatimni anglab yetishim
Mendagi bu holat normal emasligi doim bilganman. Lekin, muammo aynan nimada ekanini ham, bu holatni qanday nomlashni ham, birovga qanday tushuntirishni ham bilmas edim. Ko'p marta doktorga ham ko'ringanman. Lekin, nima bo'layotganini tushuntirib berolmaganim sabab aniq tashxis qo'yisholmagan (yoki, doktorlar oddiy depressiyani ham farqlolmayidgan mol bo'lgan). Keyinchalik, o'qib-izlanib, bu holat fanda "depressiya" deb atalishi va bu ruxiy kasallik ekanini bilganimdan so'ng bu borada yanada ko'proq o'rganishga kirishdim. Xulosam shu bo'ldiki, agar rostdan ham bu holatdan chiqib ketishni istasam, menga psixoterapevtdan o'zgasi yordam berolmas ekan. Shunday qilib, psixoterapiyaga murojaat qilish haqida o'ylay boshladim. Lekin, bu juda uzoqqa cho'zildi. Ichimda nimadir bunga izin bermas edi (keyin bildimki, bu ham depressiyaning ta'siri bo'lib, depressiyadagi inson bundan chiqib ketish ichun hech qanday harakat qilmaydi, qilolmaydi). Vaqti kelib, psixoterapevtlarni izlay boshladim. Juda ko'pi bilan gaplashdim. Lekin, birortasi ham to'g'ri kelmadi. Oxiri, Sarvinoz Omonova ham borligi esimga tushdi. Shunday qilib u bilan terapiyani boshladik.

1/2

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-09 07:42:21 story time

i woke up early for my morning lecture today and after having breakfast i dressed up like the sexy bitch that i am. and came to the classroom. but the students looked strangely unfamiliar. but still i took a seat and waited for the professor to come and start the lecture. and there he came but he was not my professor. it was a different man. then i looked at my friend in confusion. he gave me the same look. then we realized we were in the wrong classroom (hihi). it turns out, today's lecture was cancelled. but we had no idea. but still i was happy bcuz i woke up early because of that. which is nice. alright i need to study for finals now. ok bye!

moral of the story: wake up early and always check you class announcements

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-04 19:50:45 - what's wrong?
- i... i miss her...
- even after all this time?!
- always...

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-03 19:40:52 They may not be around any more. But their presence still lingers in the melodies they left behind...

Neyim bor edi sendan boshqa?..

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-02 06:56:44 story time

so there's this guy. he's my favorite human. in fact, he's the only human i interact with everyday. and so am i for him. we're like best friends or brothers. but when we first met we only talked in english for quite a while for no apparent reason (i know thats cringe). and when we finally spoke uzbek we were both surprised bcuz it sounded so... umm.. cute? (i couldn't find another way to put it, honestly). he was like "omg you sound so cute in uzbek". and im like "oh i know right and you too". i still dont get it. this happens with so many other people too.

so the moral of the story: seriously im done with this morals!

thanks for reading my weird morning story! have a good day

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-01 17:52:04 ​​story time

so you know i was preparing for TOPIK (yes i know, it's taking forever) and i was using a textbook from the library. but it really sucks sometimes when you cannot prolong the book and have to return it, bcuz some other mf reserves it too. and finally i said fuck it and decided to buy a new one of my very own. and i checked all the offers online. and found a few good deals on our good old "alladin used books store". they never disappointed me so far and also the prices were reasonable as always. in fact i bought a book in excellent condition for the half price (right, student life). and it arrived today. and you guessed it, it is in perfect condition.

moral of the story. i dont know. maybe, go buy an old book or something. (seriously. why do i always have to come up with a moral for my stories??)

thanks for reading my bed time story. bye!

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-12-01 16:25:12 confession time

today i didnt go to my class and attended thru zoom instead and i lied to my professor that i had fever and thats why i couldn't go to the classroom. but in fact, i did not have fever. i just didn't want to go all the way to the campus in this freezing cold. may god forgive me. ok bye.

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash

2021-11-30 18:00:57 and this December we're healing from the things we dont talk about

@kitobqurti Ochish/sharhlash